18 Things That Happen At Every Burns Night
It’s not all just haggis and dancing you know.
1. If you’re hosting, you buy all the Scottish food you can find.
But no-one’s going to eat that much shortbread, so it sits in your cupboard for months afterwards.
2. You think you might still be able to fit into your kilt from school.
NEWSFLASH: There’s no way that’s going to happen.
4. One of your friends attempts to address the haggis.
But they can’t get any further than the first two lines. Does *anyone* know the whole thing off by heart?
5. It’s your bi-annual reminder that haggis is actually a bit gross.
Oh well, just forget about the fact you hate your national dish until St Andrew’s Day.
6. Drinking whisky makes your feel patriotic.
Until the next day, when it makes you feel like your head is being gripped by an eagle’s claw.
7. You gotta dance.
Doesn’t matter if you’re just hosting a party in your flat, as soon as dinner’s over, you push that sofa aside and get reeling.
8. If you go to an organised event with your friends, you swear you’re going to mingle with new people.
9. Going to a ceilidh means you’re going to have a sore arm for at least a week afterwards.
Dammit, over enthusiastic Strip the Willow.
10. When the reeling kicks off, you realise your choice of footwear is wildly innapropriate.
Girl, either you take your shoes off, or you break both your ankles.
11. Having to keep your cool if you end up dancing with someone you fancy.
You got this.
12. When some particularly overzealous dancing makes you regret drinking all that booze.
And having that extra pudding.
13. You try not to get annoyed with the person who doesn’t know all the steps properly.
It’s ok, you were a beginner once too- OHMYGOD MOVE.
14. When you’re spun round so fast by your dance partner everyone can see your pants.
Probably one of the only times this will be an issue for both men and women. Little piece of advice: always wear underwear to a ceilidh.
15. You get so exhausted during two consecutive dances that you have to sit the next one out.
And probably the two after that as well.
16. Not only are you exhaused, but you’re sweaty as well.
So. Damn. Sweaty.
17. You come to the conclusion your should probably up your fitness game.
*Signs up to gym first thing on Monday morning*